There is no key to happines. The door is always open. -Mother Teresa
I totally agree with that. I am young, but life already gived me hard times. And you know what? I am a lot of stronger, happier, smarter and wiser than I was.
I had to faced my biggest fear, failure. I was very busy with wishing, hoping and expecting… I belived in my success. I was to optimistic. ‘Cause in the end, I failed.
I was feeling so sad, angry and jelaus on person who win over me. Bu I didn’t show it. I acted happy an fun, bu I wasn’t. The thing is, this person is my good friend. And it hurts so much if you hate and love someone. Why did I hide my feelings? There are two resaons. I was afraid that people I love wil leave me, after knowing my dark side. That’s the first reason. The second is, that I didn’t want others to be nervous, sad or worry because of me.
The time has past and I was still totally into my fake smiling. But one day… Everything just explode. All feelings, thoughts and never-told words… i told this to some my friend and they helped me, not leave me. I strated expresing with art. And you know what? I am happy now.
I know now, that is my fault for my sadness, not of person who won over me. I put myself into that mess. I am not proud on my weakness, flaws and mistakes. But I learn to accept them.
That’s why I belive there is no key to happines. If you want to be happy you are. But if you belive that you are poor and sad than that’s who you are.
Life is like we make it.
This is my story. I just want you to know, who is the girl you are may reading about.
-Flower in rainy day